It’s been a tough week for my mom and our family. It’ s just not easy to be 93 with complications. There hasn’t been much hospital time in her adult life but the older you get, the harder it is to avoid and we all held our breath for that week away that she would come back home with herself intact. It seems that even though she needs a lot of sleep she is happy to be home with her dog and her husband. But her home has changed.

The rest of us have used this golden opportunity for a gentle intervention to renovate our family home to make it more user friendly for both of our parents. My dad has been on board with chair lifts, furniture changes, tubs transformed into showers, but it’s breaking our hearts to what my dad fume over an invasion by helpers. We have a staff of cleaning people a nurses now welcomed in to clean daily, take over the washing and drying of clothes, making meals and my dad is furious.

I am resolved to honor my dad and respect his frustrations. Of course it’s easy for me. I don’t live across the street. I can make my daily calls and offer support and some humor and then hang up. I can visit once or twice a week but it’s my brother and sister-in-law with the daily routines that are constantly broken. Dad, I’m thinking about you and about me.

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Categories: Project 365: An Afternoon With... | Tags: | 4 Comments

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4 thoughts on “

  1. It is so hard trying to balance what aging or ill parents need with what they want:(

  2. Exactly! 🙂

  3. It is heartbreaking and frustrating to see your parents feeling the inevitable loss of power over their lives. It’s so hard for everyone concerned. My heart is with you.
    Lynn

  4. It has been a great wake up call for all of us to provide what both of them need to stay healthy as they grow more fragile. They had to open their home to more help and the house is cleaner and they are better cared for but you do think more about your own mortality. Right?

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