Conversations with Eileen: Day 2, SOLSC #27

As one challenge comes to an end a new one arrives!

Day #27 for March Slices, Day 2 for Conversations with Eileen and the world.

Dear Eileen,

Yesterday I had that important conversation with my friend Sharon who like you, knows me, worts and all.  Recently, Sharon lost one of her very close friends and in a few days she will be traveling to Mexico, to be with some of  Diane’s other close friends as they find some closure.  A well known photographer, Sharon’s poems and photos will be included in a tribute book to her.

As I think about it, you and Sharon have a lot in common.  Friends before I had Tuvia, gave me years to establish friendships without the time restrictions sometimes placed on friendships outside that central relationship.  We talked for hours on the phone, sat across from each other drinking coffee, even played hours of tennis in the heat of July and we were passionate about the same things.

With you Eileen, we talked family, politics, books, tech (when you let me), what we hoped for.  With Sharon, our bond centered around our teaching at Pearl River High School and how we could merge art and writing and theater.  On the same wave length, kids often called us by the other’s name. Now that we are both retired, our lives move in very different directions,but there is always time for a walk in a Rockland park with or without cameras in hand.  Our passions intersect differently but Sharon both of you  offered me a different mirror for reflection.

And now my question is how do I hold on to you?  

I’m sitting in the darkness of Tuesday, up 4 hours too soon, but then I expired yesterday at 9:00, leaving Tuvia to read in the kitchen. But tonight was a surprise night to be together. Usually we are on our own on Monday nights but when our weekly schedule changes we are very flexible. Today we will be on our own.  Tuvia will dine with his family before they leave on Spring Vacation and I’m off to visit your family as they invite friends to stop by and support them through the first days without you.

I’ll be sitting in your living room, at your dining room table, in your living room and everyone will be there, except you, of course. I wonder how often I will be back at that table, that’s what I’ve been thinking about.  How do I keep up with the family I know from your eyes, that holds you still?

Good thing that I’ve made plans to take the ride up to my town, see my parents, spend time with your family and then spend the night with my brother and sister-in-law. A good opportunity to hear more about their upcoming trip to New Orleans for the Final 4 and share more details about their daughter’s wedding plans.  A good life balance: rejoicing in the past and  planning for the future.

It’s almost the end of this month of Slices and I’m going to miss the daily comments and the rich Slices to read.  I couldn’t read Slices every day but some days I could read with wild abandon. And I have my writing mojo back.

YES!

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Categories: Conversations with Eileen, SOLSC 2012 | Tags: , | 9 Comments

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9 thoughts on “Conversations with Eileen: Day 2, SOLSC #27

  1. You’ve said it best, “rejoicing in the past and planning for the future.” It will be good for you to be with family. You brought a smile to my face when you said your writing mojo is back. Still smiling 🙂

  2. grade4wizard

    I thought to take quick break from checking student work and read some slices. Through your slices I entered a world of friendship and loss. Sad, beautiful, mourning, celebrating, looking into the future.
    Tunnen kaasa! (condolences in Estonian)
    Terje

  3. Times like these are difficult to traverse. Your memories and reflections will help you through. I’m glad writing is helping.

  4. You want to hold on to your dear friend, and you have your writing mojo back…it seems to me that your desire will merge with your art, your photography, your music, your writing…and through these you will always find a way to connect with old memories held dear and honor your friend.

  5. How do we hold on to dear ones after they pass from our physical lives. You ask a very important question of Eileen. I’m not too sure of the answer to this. I hope you find it.

  6. I hit enter too soon. Yikes.

    Anyway, I hope you find the answer. I think that the way, for me, has been to look at photographs and to share stories of the person I hold dear. It’s not the perfect solution, but it’s what has semi-worked for me.

  7. wkb57

    Seems like the two of you shared many things. My prediction is that as you continue with your passions, Eileen will join you (perhaps sitting on your shoulder) now and then. After some of the pain leaves you, I expect you will laugh as you remember a funny story, cry as you realize you can’t reach out and touch her, and savor how you touched each others lives. I expect you will see some of Eileen’s qualities in other people, turn a familiar corner and see her face, and hear her voice calling to you for a variety of reasons. She was and is your friend forever. It some way, she will always be with you. Keep writing Bonnie…I know it helps.

  8. Bonnie,
    Your thoughts are the thoughts of many of us. How do we hold on? I know from experience that there will be a day and something will remind you of your dear friend and it will seem like she is there. So I guess my answer would be in the wonderful memories you created together and all you shared.

  9. I like the easy camaraderie you are expressing here with Eileen, Bonnie. It just seemed to flow from part to part so well. The thing about this blogging is that you can publish your words about Eileen and make a nice book. Maybe time will alter such a plan, but someday perhaps you will want to gather things of hers, etc. Thank you for sharing.

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